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トーン・ホーク Torn Hawk 強力な昔の本の映画が好きです I Like Movies About Old Books That Have Powers

Side A:
バッドなアイツ Bad Boyfriend
もしかして Is It Because
ぼくが好きなら変わってよ Change For Me
彼女がいなけりゃノーチートス No Cheetos Without Her

Side B:
ピストル持った強盗 Armed Robber
タワー&斧 Tower & Axe
『愛されちゃって、マフィア』の好きなあの娘が好き I Love That She Loves Married To The Mob
スラッシュクレスト Slashcrest
ノー・サレンダー No Surrender

Composed and recorded by Luke Wyatt Published by Framed Mistake (ASCAP) / Domino Publishing Company USA (ASCAP)

Covered in dust and cob webs, bad halloween makeup, wax lips, chewed-up candy corn; recorded on tapes left stuffed in the lining of an old parka that a relative wore to Mets games and spilled Miller Lite all over.

This music was not supposed to survive aboveground.

But then the elf lobby pushed hard for these tracks (recorded between 2010-2014) to come out of the dust heap. I’m talking about the elves (about three inches tall) that live in the attic where I keep my guitars. They got really militant about me releasing this collection.

“We were here first, you threw all your crap in here, we want a say….”

It never stopped. Hijacking my timeline on ElfSpace, other dumb social media platforms where I’d been told to keep a presence so as to keep my thumb in the elf market pie, these elves kept up a persistent campaign that snowballed into a shrill chorus I couldn’t ignore. You can’t shut up a car alarm by wrapping a sleeping bag around it.

Elves are aesthetically pretty conservative and generally like dusty sounding music with a lot of guitar. That’s their old-fashioned sound. They sit around on the porches of their little dollhouses with their little boots propped up on little barrels of moth mead, looking at paper collage sunsets created by 8-year-old human girls during rainy day lunch recess. 8-year-old human girls decorate their world— that’s what little girls do when they’re not allowed to play outside because the sky is crying.

One of the tracks in this collection appears in a shorter/alternate form on the FIST cassette. Don’t make big deal about it.

It’s bad form to call your own tracks heroic but there are a couple of real meateaters on here, from back when I was swinging my big guitar around like how Donald Trump waves around his oversized red tie.

Classic American grilled cheese and Camaro, Hawaiian Punch-stained pleated Dockers on a sunny day. Enjoy!